The Dao of Dragon*Con

Life after Dragon*Con seems so slavishly normal this morning. I need a 12-step, geek detox/reprogramming system just to fit back in. What panels am I attending this morning? Which concerts am I going to tonight? When will I ever get some sleep?

I started this trip to Dragon*Con with a heavy heart. I received the news day before we left that a friend from college had died. Each year we've gone to Dragon*Con, I've seen his doppelgangers and clones out of the corners of my eye and had to check to see if they were really him. They never were. While this year, I didn't have any major double takes, a picture very similar to his Facebook avatar was prominently displayed several places around the con. A hard reminder. I had been looking forward to telling him what I saw in this post. I found out Saturday that he chose the timing of his death.

I didn't sleep well or long enough Wednesday night, a trend that continued throughout the con. I'm not a person who deals well short of sleep. But Vitamin D has become my friend. It's like the Ecstasy of the vitamin world. Like the Red Bull of happiness and light.

Thursday came early with some annoyances at the airport. We flew a new airline, AirTran instead of Delta. They accumulated two strikes quickly. Because the plane was late arriving in Tampa on our way out, they boarded half of us through the rear door. Nothing like standing in the 90 degree Florida sun to put you in the right mood. Turns out that was foreshadowing. Strike two came when they didn't post our flight at baggage claim, so we had to hunt around an extra 15 minutes to find the right carousel. Combined with the 15-minute ground-stop in Tampa, we were 30 critical minutes late getting to the hotel.

We checked into the hotel, grabbed some water and headed for registration. By the time we got there, the line was wrapped around three sides of the block. By the time we left 4 HOURS later, it was all the way around. After the same experience last year (with a different registration process), I was less than pleased. But I was ok (think Dao, think Zen, read a book). Until I got to the front of the line. And met the woman behind the desk. Who gave absolutely no instructions. Just leaned back in her chair like we should know exactly what to do. By divination. And then waited for one of her associates (who was literally running between stations) to do her work. I about lost it.

The sheer inefficiency of the manual (as in non-computerized), poorly thought-out registration system easily added 2 hours to our time in line. I mean fundamental (expletive deleted) errors, like an alphabetical sort by line where they were pulling H-K out of line an hour behind us because, wow, there just aren't that many people with those last names. Yet they had a dedicated person to serve them, who by design, could do nothing else. ComiCon, GenCon both have many more people attend and 1/4 of the time in line. Then the con had the audacity to post on its Twitter Feed "Please limit the negativity in the Registration line." Sorry, but they earned every bit of negativity they got (not from me, who kept my mouth shut out of fear what might come out). With interest. By the time we had badges, I was completely power-down reset off-(expletive deleted)-line. Never a-(expletive deleted)-gain.

So we spent a lot of Thursday night trying to detox. We got some dinner (after no lunch) at 9, pre-bought two days of breakfasts and tried to get some sleep. Unfortunately, our room was on the first floor (good) right above the Motor Court (bad) and configured to where all the noise from it bounced directly at our window (ugly). For those who haven't been to Dragon*Con, it's a 24 hour event. So I slept fitfully a while. Then I woke up at 2 and each time I drifted off, someone screamed (like they were right outside the window). It was like sleeping in a dorm room where you knew words are being spoken somewhere but can't pick them out. With the exception of F-this and B-that. Those came through loud and clear. When Karen drifted awake at 3, I told her we had to move. So that's what we did between 3 and 4 am. The desk wasn't sure if we wanted to wait until morning to make the change. Uh, no, I'd like to get 4 hours sleep tonight, thanks. Honestly, the hotel was fine with it. I have no complaints about them. Just bad luck of the draw for us.

By early Friday, it was apparent there were a lot more people than last year. I'd say 10-20% more. To the point the Fire Marshall shut down the Marriott lobby three times over the weekend. The first time was Friday night as we were coming back from two concerts at 2:30 am. Hotel guests only and the floor was still cleared when we came through. We found out on the way home that someone had tossed a phone from somewhere high in the hotel (42 floors, all accessing an Atrium) and it crashed onto the lobby tile right by a friend of ours. No one hurt, luckily. Again Saturday at 2 am coming home, badges or hotel key-card for entry (for sheer crowds, we think). And Sunday at 3 am (crowds again, we think, which we've never seen that late).

All day, every day the place was more packed than we'd seen it. Several rooms filled to capacity. A couple panels we couldn't get into because they were SRO full. Not Celebrity panels, Science panels, Armory panels, Gaming panels. We were lucky that we were there 20 minutes early for a few panels just to get a seat. There was a huge line for the Cruxshadows concert, and they seated it an hour early, before the preceding concert. Though an advantage to being my age, stature and (button-down) shirt is when someone tries to cut between me and Karen (holding hands single file) to cut the line, one glare puts a complete stop to it. And the staff ignores us. The hall was as packed as we've ever seen it and this was our 6th time seeing them there. Great to see, but...

Monday I got to sleep about 4:30 am then woke up at 8:30 am to donate blood, my only chance without a line. Short-sleep, little breakfast, mildly dehydrated, bad idea. But I really wanted the shirt. I felt the wave of light-headedness sweeping down way too late to do anything about. Feelin'... kinda... woozy... A bottle of Gatorade and I was fine. Never happened to me while donating blood before. This is like my tenth or twelfth time, the last in February. But I got my shirt, which was way cooler than the con shirt I could have bought for $25. So did Karen, but they rejected her from giving for an irregular heartbeat. Just peachy.

On our way home, we got a look at the dark-side of the US Air Force in the airport. I've never seen a sergeant cut off in a brew-house before. For his own good, if he wanted to get home (they won't let him on the plane drunk). Didn't help that he was acting like a complete predator with the young woman at the table next to us. Luckily, he had an airman with him with a good (and clearer) head on his shoulders. And the staff handled the situation with understanding and aplomb.

See by now, you're thinking this was a vacation from hell. It really wasn't. I'm not sure why (ok, maybe the Ecstasy thing. Kidding). We just didn't have time for the drama I guess. We did what we had to do. We adapted. With everything else going on, we weren't in the mood to stress over it. So we made sure to be in the right place for the panels we really wanted to see and then hung out more.

On the plane Thursday, I started another story, writing seven pages in the notebook, set on location in Atlanta. This is the third year I’ve done this story in an hour trick. I’ll work on that next. Friday we hit the dealers’ rooms and got to catch up with our friend from England and her new beau. That was nice. Saturday was really thin after we got bounced from one panel (SRO out the door) and another was cancelled. But we hung out in the lobby for a while with a friend from St. Pete who Karen talks photography with. That was nice, too. We got to do the music tables without making them a drive-by. Sunday, we hung out more and got to see our group of friends in pretty cool Plan 9 from Outer Space costumes, shades of gray like the black and white movie, complete with face-paint on all exposed skin. We texted back and forth with a couple people, letting them know where we would be and vice versa. It was cool to have someone say, that sounds interesting, I think I'll go there instead.

This was the first con were we saw a number of people who seemed happy, genuinely happy, to see us there. Some called out across the room. One was bouncing up and down (seriously, that doesn't happen with me). There are a slew of people from St. Pete who go now (like 17+). On the way home, we had 6 others from our extended group on our flight, so we got to wander through Tampa airport and onto the shuttle to parking, and compare notes with them. That was really nice, too.

We got to see a photographer from Chicago who we'd met there two years ago and talked to online whose face lit up when he saw us. He knew I hadn't been in his panel because one of our friends ratted me out. I'm exchanging emails with another panelist I've written before who didn't make it this year, but wanted to. Even he seemed happy to hear from me.

Even people we didn’t know. The first time the maid came, we were in our room. I guess we did something right with her, too. Every time we saw her from that day on, even way down the hall, her face brightened and she waved. Not the corporate, be nice to the guests wave, but a hey, you're ok, thanks for treating me like a person wave. As an added bonus, it looks like the hotel comp'ed us for one night (without us asking). So between that and the Rewards we used, hotel was half price this year.

When did I step into the twilight zone? Cerebus feels good. Cerebus feels really good. Cerebus never feels really good.

Dragon*Con: it's like going to an extended reunion and seeing all the cousins you never met and maybe never wanted to know, but still feeling that draw of family and knowing that you're at home, however crazy they act and however normal you now might seem.

So the synopsis for the year, 17 panels, 6 concerts and 2 concourse performances. We came home with 5 CDs, 2 sets of dice, an auto-dice roller, 2 blood shirts and 3 t-shirts as gifts for friends. We didn't even kill off all the food we squirreled away in our luggage on the way up. But we didn't run out of room for purchases, either.

From here on is a breakdown of panels and concerts.

For us, there are four levels of panels: Great, good, worthwhile and bust. A Worthwhile panel is one that makes us think on at least one point, or one we discuss with someone (or each other) later even if we didn't agree with the panelists. A Good panel is one that entertains us, or strings together a number of good points that get us thinking more about the topic. A Great panel is one that has us laughing or one that is so interesting we look up a panelist, maybe even write them, or check out the material and websites they gave us. A Bust is one with a bad speaker, or a speaker who is unprepared, or worse doesn't know their topic (or is just plain wrong), or is cancelled or subbed without notice, or hijacked off-topic. With that in mind, here's a rundown of this year's panels.

Evolution by Leaps and Bounds (Science, Fri.) - Good. I circled three notes I need to go check out. First was Carotenoids, specifically in a species of sea slugs that stores chlorophyll from things it eats bit by bit until it achieves the ability to photosynthesize. Second was an article in Nature in 2004 by Adami on treating AIs like a biological systems. And finally, the Red Queen Hypothesis from virology that evolution is a continuing race for a species just to continue to survive in its current niche. A speaker we'd go to see again.

Designing a Language (Writing, Fri.) - Good to Great. The speaker (a linguist) did a good job at teaching the audience the fundamentals of linguistics by using science fiction and fantasy languages as examples. The only mark against was that he ran out of time, thinking he had 1.5 hours instead of 1. But he had handouts (which usually rates a Good, minimum). I need to contact him to see if he can recommend an introductory book on linguistics for laymen. I also want to see where a particular characteristic of Welsh fits in to what he said. A speaker we'd go to see again.

Earthquakes and Volcanoes (Science, Fri.) - Bust. I felt sorry for the speaker who was very nervous. I got the sense she was talked into giving the presentation. Someone else wrote up the description of it for the program, which she quickly said she wouldn't cover as advertised. Biggest problem was that she wasn't a geologist, and the geologist sitting beside me just shook her head every time I looked over questioning what I heard. The USGS seriously needs a presence up there.

How Your Brain Works (Science, Fri.) - Good to Great. Missed a definite Great because it was well under time. But the speakers were good. And there were highly entertaining examples of what they were trying to show us. They opened with an example of how you mishear lyrics, O 4 Tuna (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1KaOV3dBlts). You will never hear Carmina Burana the same way again. The only issue I had was with single, tangential comment on mammography that I may write one of the speakers about. A couple websites I need to check out (http://www.quirkology.com/ and http://www.theinvisiblegorilla.com/). Two speakers we'd go to see again (one an old favorite, Dr. Jason Schneiderman).

Intuition (Art, Sat.) - Great. I connected to both the speaker (an artist who draws and paints) and her husband (a writer). She had a handout. But because of a technical issue getting her Power Point to the monitor, she opted to give a sketch demo for examples. I have a couple ideas she tossed out circled (steal other people's dreams, use a light table to preserve elements of sketches that work in an otherwise unworkable piece). http://www.paulina.ws/

Future Weapons (Science, Sat.) Good. An entertaining speaking who is in the Senior Executive Service of the US Army's R&D, Engineering Command. Another speaker who did an excellent job at teaching the audience how the military actually develops weapons using science fiction and fantasy weapons as examples. On the downside, he showed a US Army video of what they blue-skyed of what a high-tech war in 2035 would look like. Almost hilariously out of touch with both capabilities of the enemies we are likely to face and the current budgetary constraints. But he seemed to know that. My friend who works in that arena as a contractor would have torn apart a several statements. Most interesting part was he was setting up a contest for the people in the room to take what they learned and use it to propose a new weapon or armor system. He and others in his office would judge them, and if the were good enough, would put together a paper/proposal that they would present higher up. The previous administration talked a lot about tapping into the knowledgeable but creative general public to see if they can help think outside the box. Took a while, but here it is.

Literary Attraction (SF Literature, Sun., E-only) - Good. The panel had two authors and a neuro-psychiatrist to discuss the differences in what men and women like in what they read and how much of that is biologically based. A couple fascinating points. First, people only fight for two reasons. One, for survival. Two, for the right to breed. There are no rules in fighting for survival, while there usually are in fighting to breed. Women ONLY fight for survival as they already assume the right to breed. Second point, gender and sexuality are two different things in the case of what's attractive in literature to women and men. There was a book recommendation I need to check out called Sperm Wars. Again, one of the panelists was a favorite, Dr. Jason Schneiderman.

Live Portrait (Art, Sun. K-only) - Great. Donato Ciancola gave a portrait painting demo using a photograph as a subject. Karen said it was fascinating to watch. So much so she found me after my panel to come see the mostly finished product, which I got to see again in the Art Show. Yeah, he's good. http://www.donatoart.com/

Board Gaming (Gaming, Sun. E-only) - Great. Two entertaining, knowledgeable presenters (one is the director of the board gaming at Dragon*Con) with the Gaming track director acting as a light-handed moderator from the side. I have a dozen games I need to check out on www.boardgamegeek.com. These two were hilarious speakers. They hold a regular board game night at their church. We're talking Settlers of Catan, Last Night on Earth, Pandemic, Arkham Horror. As they said, perhaps theirs isn't a normal church. Best piece of advice for checking out games was to search YouTube. People have put together demos for many, many games. Dragon*Con owns 300+ board games and gets another 1000 on loan that people can check out (library style) at the convention to give a test run.

Photo to Fantasy (Art, Sun. K-only) - Great. A introductory to intermediate panel on using PhotoShop to enhance your photographs. Inspired Karen with a number of techniques she wants to try. Given by another speaker we'll listen to any time, both for his technical knowledge and his ability to make us think, Amul Kumar. A great photographer, too. http://amul.biz/ - NSFW

Dungeon 101 (Gaming, Sun.) - Great. The Gaming track director, who is a credited game designer gave this one. Highly entertaining and informative. His second panelist canceled on him, so he gave a 5-10 minute intro on what a dungeon is (from a design perspective) beginning with verisimilitude and then took the rest of the time as Q&A. I've seen very few speakers who could pull off that format the way he did with a packed house of 150+ people. It was so packed they were checking badges at the door when Karen joined me halfway through. Another speaker we would see again.

Japanese Ink Painting (Silk Road, Sun., K-only) - Bust. Karen ditched out halfway through to join me in Dungeon 101. The speaker had a prepped talk (and a handout) but just read straight off the handout then asked if there were questions. She didn't think the few examples he showed were representative, nor did he really show how to do it.

Stealth in Space (Science, Sun.) - Good. Entertaining. The quick answer is, there is no stealth in space, at least in the way it's portrayed in Science Fiction, at least with our current understanding of physics. The speaker did his homework, complete with calculations. Not a lot of new information for me. Another speaker we would listen to any time, Dr. Stephen Granade http://granades.com/

The Future of Pen and Paper RPGs (Gaming, Sun.) - Good. We only caught the last 1/3 of it (when we ducked out of the previous panel's Q&A). From what we saw, another solid performance on the Gaming track by two panelist in the RPG publishing business. And coming out of the panel was one of the first times someone has struck up a conversation with me based on what I was saying to Karen. Kind of weird, but kind of cool too.

Old School Techniques (Art, Sun) - Good. Don Maitz gave a show and tell of some of his work from art school 40 years ago. I took a fair number of notes on things like value drawings, light, background color, positive and negative space, etc. If nothing else, for me, it helps to appreciate the art that I see. Plus he had some really cool head-shot sketches of people he'd seen around various cons that he'd converted to fantasy characters. Very accessible, and knew the ins and outs of traditional art subjects, including how you need to bring your knowledge of the physiology to a painting. His best advice, remember your eye is better than any camera. Photographs can't tell you where to build color and where not to. Photographs lie, your eye doesn't.

Cult of Personality (Apocalypse Rising, Mon.) - Worthwhile. Barely. Started as a Bust with the psychologist running the panel saying she didn't know much about it but thought it would be cool to talk about, and then left ALL her research and notes at home, so she couldn't confirm what she said was right. But one of the audience members had a PhD in History focusing on Apocalyptic Studies. They drafted her onto the panel. The one piece of information that sparked discussion between Karen and I was why Steampunk was rising in popularity just as Goth was declined. We didn't necessarily agree with the speakers on that point completely, but an interesting set of thoughts.

Staying Sane (Writing, Mon.) - Worthwhile. A large panel of authors and editors talking about how they stay sane in the publishing world as well as what drives them crazy. I was hoping it would be more from the point of view of the type of things writers struggle with (validation without publication, friends/family not understanding what they do, the day to day isolation, etc.). While they lightly touched on that, it was going to quickly move to war stories from the publishing business, which seems to be what the attendees of that track really want. We opted to leave early so we didn't feel rushed at the airport. The one good point they brought out was on how contracts were structured, specifically a common Catch-22 regarding advances, royalties and reserves against returns, as well as the devil's bargain the publishing houses struck in the 30's regarding returns and how e-books are finally changing that.

Concerts are an easier grading system. Either we like them or we don't. I try not to judge too harshly. These are some of the hardest working people at the con. I couldn't do what they do. They lay themselves out in the arena of public opinion then have to sit by a table for four days as people just walk by.

Attention System (Friday, concert) - Worthwhile, but not our thing. There is nothing technically wrong with them. Polished but forgettable. They remind me of another group I listened to in college (that I can't remember either). More straightforward rock than I was looking for. http://attentionsystem.com/

Ego Likeness (Friday, concert) - Great, as always. Even when the singer's mike went dead mid-song, they didn't miss a beat. The guitarist just stepped to center stage, and the singer sang to the front row. And the lead singer was just recovering from laryngitis. So not a long set, but you wouldn't know if they hadn't said. They kept coming out for encores. This is one of the bands that saw Karen through chemo. I feel like I owe these guys. And that's not a mercy recommendation. They make great music. I felt bad when the lead singer had to wake up the guitarist (her husband who was sleeping with his head on the table) to get him to sign Karen's CD. But he was immediately right there to interact, then crashed again. http://www.egolikeness.com/

I:Scintilla (Saturday, concourse and Saturday, concert) - Great. We caught them on the concourse first to see if they were any good. You can tell a lot about a band when they perform an acoustic set, no matter what type of music they play. You can't fake that type of talent. They were good enough to buy 2 CDs on the spot. The lead singer has a powerful voice. She overpowered the two small Bose they had setup on the concourse. Not blew them out from kissing the mike, just blew right past them into the audience. I thought, well, she will be interesting to hear with some real speakers and amps. She blew through those, too. Pure, raw talent with great control. The speakers just couldn't handle her. You can't quite hear it on the album. I've never heard anything like it. Their music would be zoned light industrial. http://www.iscintilla.com/

Black Tape for a Blue Girl (Saturday, concert) - Worthwhile, but not our thing. In fairness, we only caught 2-3 songs at the end of their set, as they were on opposite I:Scintilla. What we heard reminded me of a kind of Blue Velvet sound, strange, oddly kind of 30's/40's/50's fused into something out of the 80's. Dark cabaret really does cover it. http://www.blacktapeforabluegirl.com/

Celldweller (Sunday, concert) - Great. I considered just seeing him, but they forced seating for both his concert and the Cruxshadows at the same time, with a massive line. When we told the guy who is Celldweller, that we actually intended to see him that night, and not just to get into the Cruxshadows concert, he was shocked. "Really?" Really. Made his morning. Great video presentation with the concert. And 2 CDs worth of goodness. http://www.celldweller.com/site/ http://www.myspace.com/celldweller

Cruxshadows (Sunday, concert) - Great as usual. Ok, not the best we've seen. But we knew going in that their lead singer came down with the flu three days earlier. We could tell immediately that he wasn't holding his notes as long as usual. He didn't break, he was just preserving his voice as long as he could. Of course, the entire sound system crashed mid-song on them, requiring the con-staff to reboot the amps (?!). He didn't understand either, but did White Rabbit a cappella to fill in. A consummate professional. I saw him in the Ego Likeness concert, doing a sound check of the hall, ignoring an idiot who was messing with him, and talking to the mixers. They performed a one hour, forty-five minute set. He left it all on the floor. By the time he came to Marilyn, My Bitterness (always the closer), he needed help from us to sing. And they didn't have a new single they were trying to chart. That was just for the fans. This is another band I owe. Several of Karen's chemo anthems came out of them. Again, not a mercy recommendation. They. Kick. Ass. http://www.thecruxshadows.com/

Violin Jam (Monday, concourse) - Worthwhile. A collection of violins and strings that started as an impromptu jam near the music tables a few years ago. Led by the violinist from The Ghosts Project, who we've seen on the concourse before. Just something different before we said goodbye. http://www.myspace.com/theghostsproject

As with everything in life, Dragon*Con changes year to year. Some good, some bad. It's a matter of how it all balances out. We'll see what we do next year. At the very least, we'll make a reservation in October and go from there. Next year is the 25th Dragon*Con, so it might be must-see.


© 2010 Edward P. Morgan III